126

This is going to sound totally insane - but then again, probably much of this blog does - but sometimes it’s kind of nice to get run over by life. 

There’s something about looking at the wreckage, putting hands to hips, arms akimbo, and thinking, “Welp, this has been a complete disaster. I’m just going to have to throw all of this out and start from scratch.” 

I wonder if artists ever feel the same, drawing away on paper or painting on a canvas, trying to save something with an extra line here or another dabble of paint there, and then finally it’s just time to crumple up the drawing or snap the canvas in two and start over. 

The same is true for broken dreams of all kinds. The struggle to save something beyond saving is such a slog. It is so well meaning and so exhausting, and the worst part is, everyone around the struggling savior is either thinking or saying out loud, Enough. It’s time to let go. 

I have learned over the course of this spiritual journey that letting go is by far the fastest route to a solution for just about any problem. That may sound passive or weak or just plain useless, and it kind of is. One could argue that those are just pejorative terms for surrender, which is a primary mechanism of reaching and returning to a place of faith, over and over again, as many times as we have to in a minute, hour, day, year, lifetime. We can’t let God (or Good) get to work on our problems if we’re too busy strangling them to death ourselves. 

I used to pride myself on my tenacity, my forgiveness, my relentlessness, my faithlessness. I am getting better and better at giving up real quick and making way for Good (or God) to do my dirty work for me. That’s the whole point, isn’t it? Aren’t we all looking for ways to make life easier and less stressful? 

Don’t get me wrong, I still get up, get dressed, go to work, have a life, family, and friends, but now I am far less inclined to roll up my sleeves, wade into muck with a wrench, and get to work on a problem when I have no idea how to fix it. I am much more inclined to just walk away, sit down, stay quiet, focus on my own needs, and see what God (or Good) does with it. 

It’s not always easy, because I am restless and full of really good ideas (insert massive eye roll here), but it’s getting easier, only because the solutions that have been offered to problems I have turned over to God have been far more clever or interesting or permanent or painless than whatever I could jerry rig myself through intense labor. 

So, the next time you catch yourself bailing out a sinking ship with a teaspoon or trying to put out a fire that you accidentally (or intentionally) started, maybe just step away from the problem entirely to see what God (or Good) does with it. If you need to apologize, Good (or God) will create the opportunity. If you need to receive an apology, God (or Good) will make it happen someday. Our indignation over expected timelines or outcomes is part of the problem. 

There are softer, far easier solutions and God (or Good) has all of them.