We Have to Give Credit Where Credit is Due
One of the things I occasionally find hilarious about this way of life - best vaguely described as living in faith (or living with faith?) - is how quickly I forget the fact that I have faith at all.
I am happy to report that a mentality of its okay, God (or Good) will figure it out is definitely a more and more frequent default setting, but I am also just as quick to panic and wonder, oh BLEEP, what do I do now? under a variety of circumstances. I am the Dory of the spiritual exploration world, but I’m willing to bet I’m not the only one.
At this point, I can at least turn to Good (or God) after the panic to get some assistance, but another manifestation of my garbage spiritual memory is that I also forget to give credit where it is due.
I can pray my little BLEEP off about a problem, receive a solution within an hour, day, week, month, year, and each and every time I will have completely forgotten I prayed about it in the first place. This is like asking Picasso to paint you a little something, have him hand over a masterpiece more beautiful than you imagined, then turn to all your friends and say “Look what I made!”
If God (or Good) were an omnipresent white bearded wizard with a penchant for judgment, he would be in heaven saying WHAT THE BLEEP?! the way Samuel L. Jackson does in almost every film he is in (and it really should be in all of his films, in my view).
This is why appreciation and gratitude are so important in all the spiritual practices. Just because we show up to the table finally prepared to consider a spiritual message doesn’t mean the entity to which we are willing to pray - whether it be that angry wizard guy (not my personal favorite but no judgment if it’s yours) or a nebulous free-flowing energy the color of gold (a personal favorite) or just the wind (another favorite) - hasn’t been an omnipresent source of energy and light for all eternity.
It’s not like the day we start believing can also be the day there was Good (or a God), right? If we’re willing to believe, we’re also willing to believe that God (or Good) came before our measly little brains were willing to consider it, so we have to be grateful for ALL the stuff that has happened in our lives, whether it be a positive outcome or a painful lesson learned. Am I explaining myself well? Is everyone tracking my explanation of the cosmos?
Basically, we can’t suddenly believe Picasso painted our life portrait, then think that all the brush strokes are shit except for the ones he painted just now when we were willing to acknowledge him as the painter. We have to find the beauty in all of it and express gratitude for each and every stroke of his brush from the start, and we have to acknowledge each piece of art he makes for us (i.e. each problem God or Good solves and every opportunity provided).
This is hard for some people. I don’t think you get there overnight. I think faith is a multi-stage process, and we can’t put the cart before the horse. We have to pray and learn and fail and experiment with finding faith, sink our teeth into a little bit, before we are even able to contemplate Good (or God) in all things. One incredibly helpful reframing is to consider any mistakes or hardships in our lives as either lessons learned (rather than pointless disasters) or the absence of Good (or God) in our lives.
Lose a loved one to cancer or alcoholism? That I attribute to a manifestation of a lack of God (or Good) in our lives or environment. Substance abuse is basically akin to a complete lack of faith in Good (or God), in my humble opinion. And cancer seems to be what happens to the body when we live in a culture of stress and environment filled with toxins. If there was more Good (or God) in the world, I firmly believe we wouldn’t be making poisonous products or working ourselves to death, but there’s a lot of Godlessness (or Goodlessness) out there and our hardships are the result.
Lately, I have been paying attention to the outcomes of prayers in my life and giving more credit where it is due. I can actually see God (or Good) working in my life, so it only makes sense to send a little THANK YOU out into the Universe. It’s not really more complicated than that either. I’m not crawling around on my knees looking for a pair of feet to kiss. I’m just clasping my hands together, closing my eyes, and building my faith with each acknowledgment.
The wild thing is, I can confirm that my life is becoming more positive, rewarding, and just plain better as I walk this spiritual path, and occasionally I get glimpses of some other profound layer, where I feel how much support I have had, all my good fortune, and I even get a little overcome with a powerful sense of wonder over all the Good yet to come, and, well, all I can say is…
That BLEEP is potent, man.
That effusive feeling of faith and appreciation in God (or Good) for my life and everything in it… It’s better than any drug. It feels like pure love. I can only hope that this writing helps any and all of you, Dear Readers, reach that place in life and gives them the power to return to it over and over on their own.